RSS Feed

Category Archives: A fresh start.

Well….

I haven’t written for a really long time but here I am, trying to jot down my time at this college which transformed from a place full of strangers to a place of your own kind. Writing regularly gets difficult due to lack of time and space because, hostel! But no, not using that as an excuse.

Symbiosis for me began from a small dream to actually converting it and living up to my own expectations. They say, a post grad college challenges and builds your managerial skills. If making decisions about eating the dirty mess food or having junk (again) are termed as “managing”, then yes, that’s what hostel life is all about.

I knew I grew up a little when LinkedIn became the new “most used app”, when Twitter meant following professionals and hoping for a project opportunity, when going out to the city feels like a task. Okay, that’s probably me getting older. To realize, our seniors will be gone in a few days and we won’t be disturbing them and by the time that hits us, we’ll be out. One semester down, 2nd one is, where did time fly?
Always dreamed of staying alone, without parents but what’s the best part? Staying 3 hours away from home. No laundry tension, no food tension, none of that. Staying alone in a hostel gives you a lot of freedom. But sometimes, what’s the point of living free without family?

Next high point in my life here. INTERNSHIP!! Unnecessarily stressing over the job profiles, waiting for the best suitable company and guess what? Cracked the only company I wanted. After struggling forever to get through a good MBA college, here I am, listening to Prateek Kuhad, fairy lights switched on and hoping ┬ánothing goes wrong because good things do happen, and when they do, you can’t do anything but keep yourself to the ground.

Here’s to making the most of my remaining time here and learning much more than just academics.room

Advertisements

Putting together the puzzle

Have you ever been the party pooper? The one sitting in a corner in a decent enough party waiting to be out of the god damn heels and waiting to be in your comfortable pajamas? Probably not. As you guys know (or not), I have been sitting at home without a concrete job “trying to” study. The past one year has been exhaustive, been out of touch with the recent news (no WhatsApp and no internet on phone can do that to you) and most importantly, been more involved with my own family (the best perk).
So imagine this scenario for me all right? You’re sitting at home, no WhatsApp, no twitter, no internet. Only gmail and google hangout (let’s be honest, who really chats on google hangout anyway). The games on your phone are about “Vocab building” and “Pocket Logical Reasoning”, etc. You go out once a week for your weekend class from morning to evening or go for the NGO work you generally do once a week. You stay in touch with your close friends via phone calls (trust me on this, phone calls are way way better than the WhatsApp/Hike/Twitter/Facebook chats). A normal person would go insane in that environment. Look, I survived.
You will come out of that scenario but you would have changed by then.
I won’t say I changed a lot but when you have know you changed, you have. A year back, my “excited” meant going out, getting ready but now I wouldn’t be more happier than to just go down for a walk with my dog. Parties seem a pain in the ass to attend. Attending a party is not as easy as it seems for a person who’s been home for such a long time. Here’s a step by step list you NEED to follow, just in case you’re forced to go out:
First, check the people attending the function/ceremony/party.
Second, prepare your mind to be out of the comfort zone.
Third, reconsider your friendship with the person who invited a million other people as well. (million means 5 friends in my case)
Forth, get out of your pajamas and wear something decent. (That torture, if you’re a girl, you’d understand)
Fifth, just go. Do not think again. I repeat, do not think again.
Sixth, prepare a list of “small talk” conversations. It’ll be handy if you’re meeting people you don’t like.
Seventh, do not roll eyes/make faces at people. Prepare a survival kit for the party.
You’re good to go.

Anyway, the whole point being that one of my biggest fear is here. An extrovert turned introvert. A year back, I’d love to sit and talk to people aimlessly for hours (I mean gossip) but now, I’d rather just watch Modern Family or Friends and sleep that time.
I know being an introvert isn’t all that bad, but hey, let’s face it. A person who loved to meet people and interact now likes to sit at home and do absolutely nothing. It sounds like a good life actually. No fake formalities, no fake smiles, no mandatory pictures, no need to get ready, no heels, just a blanket and a good doze of sleep.

Everyone has their comfort zones, mine is with the 3-4 people I’m extremely close to. Everyone likes to be in that zone, I’m sure you do too. A circle of people where you can not have a bath for 2 days who will still be okay with it (or maybe not but who cares anyway).
Life, undoubtedly is like a puzzle. The sooner, you assemble the pieces, the better. Accepting the pieces and their area of belongingness is what makes the difference. After accepting, you have to arrange the pieces so they fit the puzzle accurately.
I have accepted the fact that I’m in my comfort zone, the fact that a few set of people meet me out there, the fact that anything out of that zone will slowly kill me. Literally.
It’s a part of me that comes undivided. Find your comfort zone and stay there, it’s the best level of excitement you get.

Mission MBA

A year back, people said “Niharika’s life is sorted. MBA and then a good job”. I guess it sounds that simple, you know. MBA admission will be a breeze, they said. Do not believe anyone who says that. Coming from a science background, people said it won’t be that difficult. But then I took a step into arts, into BMM. And from here on, my life started revolving around square roots, percentages and what now. Blah!

The struggle is real, my friend. I joined classes a year back but due to the pressure of projects and graduate studies, never got the time to actually sit and study properly for the exams. That’s one thing I thoroughly regret too. I wish I did listen to everybody who told me to study. I wish did study actually last year. I wouldn’t have to waste a year (right now).

Anyway no point in regretting. I’ve got a lot of people to prove right now. I won’t be the smartest of the lot but I’ll be the most hard working one of the lot. I don’t know what fate has in store for me. And I didn’t believe in these superficial things like fate and luck but after having experienced last year, I really do believe fate can take you places you’ve never been before. It’s something that drives you to your destination. Guess my destination is way too far but I’ll be there. If not now, then later.

(Okay that just motivated me to study)

The famous Mumbai Monsoon

It’s that time of the season again! Hurray! Umm no, calm those monsoon vibes, the most dreadful season is here. There are 3 kind of people, as I like to think so. One group that love rain so much who don’t mind sitting in their window and enjoying people get wet with all the mud splashing from the cars. The second group of people that curse themselves everyday for this day to never come. The third and the last group of people who are completely neutral about it because hey, who needs to step out right?
Clearly from all the angst, I’ll fall in the category of hating rains so much I’d skip this season knowing the circumstances. I could literally list down the reasons why I hate rains but which is why I’m writing this article but okay.

Traffic. Every where you go, it’s flooded with just a day of rain in Mumbai. Okay rain Gods, we get it! Stop letting us be late for every work.  

Wet clothes. Goes without saying. Dump your jeans, dump your full length pants, dump your white beautiful clothes, dump it all away. With wet clothes comes the stink. Traveling in a public mode of transport with people literally touching you with their wet clothes/bodies. Not that I’m a complete hygiene freak but there has to be a limit.

Footwear. Pick out your 1 pair of footwear that you’ll wear for the rest of the monsoon period. Unless you want to save the embarrassment of slipping in front of a large public. (Happened once to me. That too on stairs. In public. Nothing can get worse than that)

Diseases, electrical cuts, sewage, bad transport facilities, a risk of flood are just a few reasons.

Also, what’s with the pakoda and chai references? Isn’t that more enjoyable in the winter (best weather everr)
No offense.

Anyway coming to the good part of this filthy (lol) period:
Comfort food. Soups are a win win situation this time. Filter coffee works. (Saving the good ones i.e. hot chocolate for the winters). Maggi would probably work (but hey, Maggi ban).

You’re saved from the Mumbai heat. No more sun, no more humidity, just dirty rain water all over.

I know people love rains and I completely respect that. What I’ve shared above is just my opinion. Hoping to not offend anyone. But enjoy this weather with steamy pakodas and coffee/chai (lol)

Dodo the Dog

700 days back, I decided how the human life has been degraded and there’s a massive need to bring about a change. 6 months and 5 days earlier, I stepped out to get an alter life for myself. To get the change I desired in the form of a living animal. Needless to say, it’s been the best decision of my life. Due to unfortunate reasons, my mother wasn’t very pleased with the idea of getting a dog home because of the mess they create. Assuring her, I went a step ahead to actually look for a dog. She strictly said no earlier but to get her to this level took a while (and of course, tears). She agreed for a small dog (in size) and I couldn’t ask for a lot back then.
I did find a suitable Lhasa Apso, named him Dodo. I know Dodo means a dumb dead bird. But it also means rare. Dodo for me symbolizes how rare things are. And how my mother went from point A to point B which was very rare for a stubborn person to do.
Anyway Dodo changed me. Dodo bought happiness to me. Dodo became my life. Dodo is everything my life needed. A paw for luck, they say. He was my lucky charm. My days went better. My nights were seamless.
Entertainer. A true form of entertainment, that. Whatever happened to getting bored at home?
Loyal. Follows my dad, my mom and myself wherever we go. Be it washroom or outside. I’ve never seen anyone be more ecstatic about seeing me walk through the door even when I leave him alone at home for almost the entire day.
Lazy. Oh yes, he’s the dog for me. Finding an opportunity to sleep every single time.

They all say, once you get a dog, there’s no going back. The amount of attachment with the dog is tremendous. (I just shed a teardrop while writing this)
Time for some black dark clouds.
Now’s the time when my mother has given up and wants him gone. She’s not ready to look at the other side. Doesn’t want to hire a helper. Doesn’t want to listen. I don’t know what’s next. I don’t know what’ll happen to Dodo.
He’s my first love. (It may sound absurd to those who don’t have pets but those who have pets can relate to it, I’m sure)
I wish there was a “cute cam” in my room capturing the adorable times between the two of us. He puts his front paw on my shoulder when he know I’m upset and oh dear, you should see how he pounces on my lap when he sees me cry (right about now).

Couldn’t have asked God for a better gift. He’s the best thing that ever happened to me. I won’t ever forget this.
Love. Always.

image

Chal Himachal

I recently made a trip to Himachal Pradesh along with 4 other friends. It was one of the most beautiful places I’ve ever seen in my life.
I’m not going to go on about the usual trip details but more about what the trip has taught me.
When 5 students go together to a far off place like that, you realize the importance of money. No, seriously. I had kept a count of small things like “20- Lays”, ” 30- ice cream”, etc. And then when you add up the numbers of the entire trip you get a mini heart ache. You tend to keep a track of the precious hard earned money.
Not just that, the feeling of being alone, the feeling of being responsible of not just you but the 4 other friends was also something to be taken into consideration for. You can’t let a friend go home with bruises or sick because parents have a mind of their own and they might just end up thinking of the worst possibilities.
Not only the experiences with the new place counts, but the experiences with friends count.
The good friend became the best friend, the friend of a friend became a good friend, the “I don’t talk to her much” became a close enough friend and a lot changed. The friendship grew deeper, tears were shed of happiness and of sadness and trust within the friends became deep by its roots.
“Sidd’s hungry”, ” Wait for Surel, guys”, “Pathetic”, ” Acha”, “This place gives such positive vibes dude” and a lot more will stay with us for a very long time now.
You know the trip was successful when you have major withdrawal syndrome. That way, this was the best trip ever. Don’t feel like going back to the daily life, don’t feel like doing anything. Just sitting back and having a nap forever would be perfect.
I couldn’t have possibly imagined this trip with other set of people. Finding comfort and trust in someone is what I mostly take back from this trip. And obviously the tan.

image

Trust and the combinations.

It’s not every time you get to trust somebody. It’s not every time you rely on a person completely. It’s not every time the person who you really respect backs out and leaves you sinking down there alone.
Standing up from a “miserable” time, I stood there, completely unaware of what was coming at me. Was it some trouble yet again? Or was it just a stroke of fresh air? What was I even expecting? Fresh air? Positive fresh air? Really?
There’s always a time when everything is just shattered and you’re so low that your heart starts to sink. Well you obviously do come out from that. And for ordinary people, you come out and there’s a new positive beginning. But for me, I would just say God has taken up a challenge to never let that happen to me.
It’s an entire cycle with no particular end. Starts with zero trust, builds up slowly slowly and reaches that extent when you can be free with him or her. And baam! It’s down again in a flash of a second. It’s done. Back to square one. Back to the feeling of “no trust acquired”.
You’re lost right now in an island far far away. No one to hear you. No one to see you. No one remembers you anymore. No one cares where you are. No one to bother you. You’re alone. Alone in your mind.
We all live in this fantasy bubble. Everything seems just alright until some truths are revealed. People turn into this selfish maniac not caring about the other people involved.
Truths, secrets, honesty, love, affection all combined together is the most deadly combination ever. It comes out together as an hazardous element which you are meant to stay away from at all times but you end up being attracted to it and hurting yourself, losing yourself and more than that, losing your friends.
Over 20 years of my life, I’ve understood that “trust” is one of the most over rated words.
Done and dusted.
Tried and tested.
Never trust. Just never.